Who Is Somatic Sex Therapy For? (And Who It Isn't)
Somatic sexual healing is powerful work. It is also very specific work. It isn't the right container for everyone. Some people need a different kind of support first, even when they feel a longing for this container I offer.
Who benefits from this work
This work may be a fit if you:
Have already explored personal growth through therapy, somatic work, meditation, or plant medicine, and want to bring that growth into your relationships and sexuality.
Notice a gap between what you understand intellectually and what your body actually knows.
Feel stuck in relational or sexual patterns that insight alone hasn't shifted.
Long for intimacy rooted in honesty, embodiment, and mutual responsibility rather than performance or people-pleasing.
Are carrying sexual shame, numbness, disconnection from desire, or a sense that something essential has gone quiet.
Sense there is another way to live beyond productivity, perfectionism, and external validation.
Are interested in sexuality as a path of healing, embodiment, spiritual practice, and personal liberation.
Are willing to stay curious, take responsibility for your experience, and meet what arises with compassion rather than blame.
Have sufficient stability and nervous system capacity to engage this work safely, and are not currently in an acute mental health crisis.
Who this work isn't for
This work is not appropriate for people who:
Are in active mental health crisis, including acute suicidality, active psychosis, or severe dissociative episodes. Somatic sexual healing requires a degree of window of tolerance that crisis states do not allow for. The nervous system needs some capacity to regulate before this kind of depth work is appropriate.
Are in early trauma recovery without adequate therapeutic support. If you are in the acute phase of processing trauma, especially complex or developmental trauma, this work is best done alongside, not instead of, a licensed trauma therapist.
Are seeking sexual gratification or a sexual relationship with a practitioner. This is a healing and educational container. Anyone arriving with the expectation of sexual gratification will be redirected. This container will support you in building the capacities and skills to have satisfying emotional and sexual relationships outside of this container.
Are using substances actively and without stability. Both erotic and plant medicine work requires discernment and groundedness. Active addiction or unstable substance use is a contraindication.
Are not willing or able to give and withdraw consent in real time. Attuned consent is not a formality here. It is the practice itself. If that feels inaccessible right now, other support may need to come first.
The difference between stabilization and depth work
Somatic and embodiment work can be profoundly supportive during crisis and stabilization. Somatic support is essential to develop a felt sense of safety and stability.
What I offer is something more specific: depth-oriented somatic and erotic work. Intensive, advanced work that moves into tender and vulnerable layers of the body, the nervous system, and the erotic self. This kind of work asks a lot of your system. It requires enough capacity to stay present with intense sensation, emotion, and intimacy as they arise, and to work with what surfaces rather than be overwhelmed by it.
Intensity does not arrive in all of my sesssions. Actually, in many sessions, people experience a depth of pleasure and relaxation they never have before. But we have to be ready for the possibility that unmetabolized grief, terror, helplessness, or rage could arise as we peal back the layers into new levels of connection and receiving.
I provide corrective experiences to your body and soul. We heal the wound of violation and betrayal through wanted experiences of touch, connection, tenderness, and respect. We heal the wound of abandonment and neglect through providing you with the touch, attention, connection, and care you always needed and never got.
We literally touch the wounds. We give the body new experiences of safe, loving, connection to orient around. So it knows something new is possible. And it can let go of outdated protective strategies.
If you are currently in acute crisis, that ground is not yet there to receive this type of work. Simply because the container I offer is designed for depth, not stabilization. Trying to do intensive depth work when what the system needs is to build safety and regulation doesn't just fail to help. It can cause harm.
If you're not sure where you are, that's worth exploring with a therapist before reaching out to me. I'm also happy to have an honest conversation during a discovery call.
Can Somatic Sex Therapy Be Combined with Talk Therapy?
Many of my clients are in therapy concurrently. The verbal processing and the body work inform and support each other. What shifts in session often gives the therapy more to work with, and vice versa.
What I'm not equipped to provide: crisis intervention, psychiatric care, diagnosis, or the kind of sustained trauma processing that licensed clinical work offers. I am a somatic sex educator, sexological bodyworker, and psychedelic practitioner. That is both a powerful container and a specific one.
If you're reading this and wondering whether you're ready - reach out. We'll figure it out together.
So What’s Next?
Book a discovery call for Eros Alchemy sessions. We’ll spend 30 min together over the phone to explore if we are a fit.
Not ready for sessions?
Continue the conversation with me at the Erotic Frontier on Substack, where I publish ongoing essays on sexuality, intimacy, embodiment, relationships, and healing.